Friday, December 24, 2010

Letter to Dad


Dear Dad,
I'm writing to you as part of your birthday present. You're getting 70 different gifts. One to represent every year you've been on this earth. This letter will just be one of them.

I'm really glad that we are all spending this Christmas together. If there's one thing that I've re-learned over the last year it is that family is important. You've always been there for me but this last year more than most I've really appreciated knowing that you're there. As an adult with my own family to support and take care of I often think back to when I was growing up. I know you didn't have the easiest of roads. Of course that in itself isn't that unusual. But what you did with what you had is one of the things that has always inspired me. I often wonder if I could have left home and joined the Airforce at 17 years old. Or if I could have made all those cross-country trips with the pregnant wife and the crazy weather. I'm pretty sure I would have had trouble with the snow in Minnesota and having to plug-in my car engine in Alaska. These are all some of my very favorite stories.

When I think of all these things that you did I realize that because you faced them and overcame them, I was given an example to follow. The times in my life that I've come up against challenges that I didn't know how I'd get through, I always had a picture of bravery and strength to look back on would give me a hope that I could make it through. I can think of no better gift that you could have given a little boy who really needed guidance. I know you weren't able to be around as much as you liked. But you always made the effort to be there even when others didn't want to let you.

I've learned that life seldom follows the path that we think it should or hoped it would. So, I'm glad you taught me through example how to make the best of what comes our way. It's a lesson that I hope to pass on to my girls.

You may never know the impact that you've had on my life and by extension the lives of my wife and kids. I suppose none of us ever get to know those sorts of things. But I want you to know that it's significant and I'm so very proud to be your son.

So, you're 70 and I'm about to be 40. I'd say we've got a good 10 to 15 years at least of golf and memories to build. And I can't wait to enjoy it with you. So you better come out and visit us in Jackson.

Love,
Your third born son
Arron

Sunday, November 7, 2010

A Hero of the Faith


On Thursday of this week my wife called me in tears. Grammy had been taken to the hospital and was unconscious. It didn't look good. Now Grammy is an old woman of 80 something years and very frail. She has been in a declining mental state for a number of years even if her physical health has been pretty good. Nonetheless, I knew that this would probably mean the beginning of the end of her time with us here on earth.


I had recently been through something very similar with my own mother when she was diagnosed with advanced lung cancer in Oct of 2008. It was very hard on me at the time so even though I didn't have the same immediate tears that my wife was experiencing I remember the flood of emotion that comes when facing the potential loss of someone that you've known your entire life. Someone that you've come to take for granted as just part of your life…part of your paradigm…part of who you are. My wife has no exposure to her maternal grandparents so this is the first time she's experienced this. Its gut wrenching at best. I liken it to being punched in the stomach emotionally and you suddenly can't breathe. It's a terrible feeling and I wish very much I could take it from her so she wouldn't have to experience it. But alas, it is as much a part of life as losing baby teeth, first loves, or having children. We are ultimately made up of the sum of our experiences and this is one she has to experience to become.
As I was reflecting upon all of this from 1500 miles away in Madison, WI. I began to think of the person that Grammy was. And I was left with these thoughts...she was amazing and she is a Hero of mine.


Elva Hand Inzer experienced so much in this life. You won't find her in the Guinness book of records. There is probably not an article on her in Wikipedia. And CNN won't ever have her on their list of unsung heroes. But her story should be told. She was a wonderful combination of the American dream and God's plan for us. She married young to Lavern Inzer after his time serving our nation in the U.S. Navy during WWII in the pacific theater. They went to seminary together and then moved to northern Nevada to be Baptist missionaries and church planters. Together they preached and planted most of the Baptist churches in the region and were active there for almost 50 years. Our family all loves the stories of Lavern driving to 3+ different churches that were sometimes 100 miles apart on a single Sunday to preach. I especially like the stories of him riding on the trail with the cowboys and preaching to them as they drove the cattle. These are all great and inspiring. But what doesn't often get told is of the support system that it took to make that possible. That support system was Elva. She raised four children and took care of Lavern as well as the other duties that a preacher's wife had. If you know Baptist churches you can just imagine…Sunday school teaching, pot luck organizing, prayer group leading, choir singing, VBS planning, and the list goes on and on. Hers was a role that was behind the scenes and away from the accolades that many of us crave. She was constant and steady. What is that ole' saying? "Behind every good man there's a great woman". In this case it certainly was true.


I only really got to know Grammy over the last decade since her and Gramps (Lavern) finally retired and moved to Dallas. I fondly remember her smile and laugh and getting hugs from her every time we'd all be together. She liked spicy foods and ice cream. She loved life and her children and her grand children and her great grandchildren. And I love the fact that my two girls got to know their great grandmother. That is rare in this day and age. I just hope that they will someday appreciate the legacy of faith and faithfulness that she passed on to them. I certainly have come to understand it appreciate it.















Today on the way home from church we got the news that she had passed and gone on to be with the Lord. I was reminded of that scripture in psalms that talks about how God is touched by our passing from this life. "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints." Psalm 116:15
She will be missed but we know she is now at peace and is starting to be introduced to her reward for all that she did during this life. I imagine that there are few in heaven that will be rewarded as much as her. She is certainly rich. Congratulations Grammy…you finished the race…you won the fight. I know that you'll be cheering the rest of us on.



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Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Mentors

This post is about mentors. We've all had them. At least I hope that everyone can say that they've had one.  I've actually been blessed enough to have had several in my 39 years on this earth.  Some I sought out.  Others seemed to just appear even if I didn't know I needed them. One such individual was a early and extremely formative mentor in my life.  In fact, I doubt I'd have any of the blessings that I sometimes take for granted without his undeniable influence on me. This man recently turned 80 years old and I wasn't able to be there to celebrate with him or tell him how much I appreciate him.  Now I hear that he has fallen ill and is in the hospital back in my hometown of Anderson, SC.  So let me take this opportunity to reflect on what he meant in my life.
Allen "Bud" Putman.  It's probably not a name you've heard before.  He's not famous outside of a few thousand or so junior high and high school band students who went to school in upstate South Carolina. If you "google" his name the only mention you can find is his time in the mile at "The Michelin Midnight Flight" mile run back in 2002. (He was 71 years old and ran it in 8 minutes and 23 seconds.  That's pretty darn good!)
For many he was a teacher.  For some of us he was a light.  For me he was an example.  Sure he taught me how to play the trumpet which opened up a world of opportunity to acheivement, recognition and the realization that I was talented and special. But more than being my Jr high and High school band director, Mr Putman or "Bud" as most called him had the conviction and compasion to take me to church knowing that I was lost without Christ in my life.
Mr Putman had been my older brothers band director so we knew him well by the time my older brother started high school and I started jr high.  My mom was a single mom raising two boys so Mr Putman took a special interest in the two of us and saw that we were ships without a rudder.  Now my older brother was always responsible and did the right thing most of the time. But I was a different story. You might say I was  in danger of "drifting".  It's not that I was a bad kid, I just craved attention a little too much and knew that acting a certain way was a good way to get attention.  And to be honest, I was pretty good at crossing the line without getting caught.
Mr. Putman saw an opportunity to use music as a way to get us to be a part of the "youth orchestra" at New Prospect Baptist church.  My brother and some of the "cool" older kids were going to do it so I wanted to go along.  Man was that the right decision! Mr Putman had been asked to be the interim music minister at the church and so he was able to bring in a bunch of us kids. It eventually led to me meeting some of my best friends throughout Jr High and High school as well as me getting involved in youth choir which in turn led to me getting saved. I also learned that I could sing pretty well. Have I mentioned before that I went to college on scholarships for singing and playing the trumpet?  I met my wife while in college.  The chain of events that have basically made up my adult life were all set in place because of the actions of this man. 
I know that none of this is coincidence.  God had a plan for my life.  But Mr Putman was the instrument that God used to bring that plan into action.  And not just for me, there are hundreds of boys and girls just like me with similar stories.  I could tell story after story of him taking the time with me to instill little nuggets of wisdom or provide guidance and sometimes correction when it was needed. Believe me, I needed it a lot.  My memory is flooded with images of almost Rockwellian type scenes like when he would pile more kids that are now legally allowed in one vehicle into the infamous "Bondo Buggy".  A 70's era maverick that was only supposed to hold 4 people but we somehow were able to cram 7-8 kids along with our musical intrument cases and usually a few music stands to boot.  Most of us were what you might call "underpriviledged" so we had no ride to anywhere.  He would just scoop us all up and take us to whatever event the band was playing at.  And when it was over, if our parents weren't there he'd pile us back in the bondo buggy and take us home one by one.  It wasn't just after school either.  I remember many a Sunday morning piling in the back of that car to head to church and then home again after sunday school and the 11 o'clock service was over.  And since he didn't know a stranger, it usually meant that you had to sit around and hear several stories told the way that only Bud Putman could tell 'em.  I didn't realize it back then, but I watched and I learned how to be a man of character and compasion in those times.  He would live it out right in front of us.  It wasn't in lectures and lesson plans, it was in a life lived with conviction and principle.

I don't know why we wait until its almost too late to tell people how much they mean to us.  It's not on purpose.  Perhaps its because we take them for granted.  Maybe its just that we get busy living our own lives.  But I know that I would be remiss if I didn't take the time to say how much I revere and love that man, Allen Bud Putman.  You sir, are a "Mensch" as they say and I am eternally grateful for you.  May your reward be great in heaven.  And may you know that you are loved by many here on earth.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

What's Been Going On?

It's been a while since I've posted to this blog.  I've been a little busy.  Crazy summer is almost a cliché but it really has been one around the Vickery home.
You remember that in back on June 17th I went under the knife for a second procedure on my right shoulder.  The ROM or range of motion just wasn't coming back so the doctor suggested that they could help it along
by doing what they call a "manipulation".   After that I was to do no travel for another two to three weeks so that I could use "the rack". (See previous post for a picture)
During those weeks I was going to PT everyday and trying to do what I could for work to keep my numbers up.  We were always under pressure to be "billable" as much as possible.  So even though I had a medical reason for not traveling I was still expected to stay billable.  It wasn't fun.  You end up having to take all of the 'garbage' assignments that no one else wants.  Anyway, it was during this time that I got a call from a recruiter that I had talked to back around the time when my mom passed away last December. 
The opportunity that I had originally talked to him about had basically fizzled into oblivion and I had all but forgot about him.  I had even interviewed for other positions that were local to Dallas since then so this recruiter and the organization that he was recruiting for was completely "off my radar" as they say.  Since things at the Big Orange hadn't really improved but rather gotten worse I was eager to see what he was presenting.  I learned that the same organization that I had talked to him about before was now going in a different direction but had come back across my resumé and were interested in talking to me again.  This was on June 28th that I talked to him.
The very next day, June 29th I had a phone interview with a new Director at the University of Mississippi Medical Center who was putting together a team to implement a HCIS or Health Care Information System called EPIC.  That interview went well and she said she wanted to have me come in for a face to face.  Well, I was due to go back on the road for the Big Orange so it was very tricky setting this up.  That same week on July 1st I had a lunch interview with a former colleague of mine named Tom who was offering me a job as well.  I was very interested in what he was offering so the UMMC interview moved to the back of my mind.   Tom was aware of the Big Orange's reputation so he asked me to check into the non-compete that I had signed.  After some investigation it was determined that it would probably result in a fight if I took a job with Tom.  That pretty much killed that because Tom wasn't willing to pay court costs if it came to it and I couldn't afford to.  Needless to say, this really ticked me off.  I already felt like an indentured servant and now it was made plain that in fact I was.  It could have been the proverbial "straw that broke the camel's back".

The next weekend I went on a vacation with my family to Camp Allen in Navasota, TX.  We attended a camp for special needs kids that we've been a part of for about four years.  Our kids really love this camp put on by Joni and Friends and so we wanted to go and have a good time and reconnect with some friends we hadn't seen in a year or two.  A few days into the camp my youngest who has Type I diabetes became ill.  Not being willing to chance the local ER we drove her back to Children's Medical Center in Dallas and she was admitted and stayed in the hospital for 5 days.  She's fine now, its just one of those things you go through when your kid has Type I.  This was the first week of July.  The next week I went back on the road and then on July 16th went down to Jackson, MS for an all day interview process with UMMC.  
Jackson, Mississippi city hallThe next week I was back on the road and midway through that week I got the feedback that UMMC liked me and was probably going to make an offer.  Well as you can imagine my head was spinning and I had no idea what I wanted to do or what I should do.  It was all happening so fast.  So I talked to the wife and we decided we needed to get away and talk and think and pray.  So where else do you go when you need to do that but Longview,  TX.  My wife's sister and family live out there and our kids were missing their cousin's so we though a road trip sounded like fun.  We packed up the kids and took off for a the weekend.  I even left work early on Friday (don't tell my old boss, he he)  So its July 23rd and we're driving the two hours out to east Texas from Dallas when the recruiter calls and conferences me in with his boss.  They think I'm about to get sent an offer and they want to know if I'll accept it.   I'm talking to them while driving down I-20 so I tell them this is not a good time.  They tried their best to press me for an answer (guess they wanted to protect their relationship with their client.  It's a big account for them).  But I stood firm and told them I needed the weekend to talk and pray with my wife about it.  I don't think they were expecting that answer.  But hey, that's how I roll.  Anyway, They reluctantly gave me the weekend to decide.   Apparently no one communicated this to UMMC because after spending the evening with my wife's sister's family playing games and having some fun I received an email with an offer letter in it.  Geesh….now the pressure is on.  They even had the nerve to give me exactly what I asked for in Salary and relocation benefits.  I wasn't prepared for that.  I mean I told them a big number I thought so that they wouldn't ask me if it wasn't right.  Did this mean it was right?  Did this mean it was God???

Suddenly our relaxing weekend away wasn't so relaxing.  We still had a good time and I'm glad we were there with family to discuss it and I certainly appreciate their wisdom and encouragement and them praying for us. 
We talked about it.  Prayed.  Then we talked some more. Then we prayed some more.  Finally I just said, "Let's sleep on it".  So we did.   We had been asking each other what percent we were each at.   75%....82%.....90%
It would appear we were going to actually do this crazy thing.  After praying one more time we decided to step out in faith.  Yes, that's what I said.  It was a step of faith.  

I handed in my resignation at work the following day while I was on the road at a client.  My boss called me later that day to introduce herself and ask my why I was leaving.   Yeah, you read that right.  She had been my manager for well over a month by this time.  I'll refrain from throwing them under the bus.  Mostly because I'd be tempted to run over them in it and back up a few times.

The new job wanted me Aug 9th.  I asked if I could wait one more week because I had a brand new client that I didn't want to leave in a bad place.  They agreed.

So, fast forward to now.  Aug 24th and I've been here in Jackson working while Shelly and the girls get everything packed up at home.  I'm going back and forth on the weekends to help of course.   Next week we close on our new house in Jackson and move our stuff and our family here.

Like I said, its been a crazy summer!   But we're excited to see what adventure lies ahead.  Who knows what God has in store here.   Sure its going to be a great career move.  Sure its more money which will be good for my family.  And yes I won't be traveling anymore for work so I'll be here for Shelly and the girls every night.  These are all blessings for sure.   But I wonder what God is really up to?  There's always a reason behind his moves…..we just have to make sure we pay attention and listen to figure out what that is.

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Friday, July 2, 2010

A Creator, a dad and a gifted child

As a parent of two beautiful daughters who are 6 and 9 years old, I find myself encountering things that make my heart swell with pride quite often.  Just about as often as I find myself reminding my girls "that I brought them into this world, and I can take them out of it" or some similar saying that I probably learned from my father.  Or was it a Bill Cosby comedy routine?   Hmmm...
The point is that I love being a father and I am constantly amazed at the wonder and life that they each were endowed with by their loving creator.  Things that I certainly cannot take credit for.  People say all the time, "Oh they take after their mother" or "She's just like her daddy".  I suppose that on some level that is true.  I certainly see their mother's beauty in them.  Stubbornness too!  (Love you dear) chuckle, chuckle...

Sometimes though one of them will say, or do something that is one of those moments that just makes me sit in awe because I know its a spark of the divine showing forth.  Its as if a glimmer of recognition of her true Father-in-heaven comes to the surface.  Last night was one of those moments with my youngest.

We call her "tunia bug" and she is, despite all the challenges that she's had to face in her young life, full of a grace and maturity that is beyond her years.  She embodies the little girl "princess" persona that most little girls her age aspire to.  Yet she also has a capacity for love and God's truth and grace that blows me away every time she let's it shine forth.  It's because of her maturity and her thirst for God and his word that I sometimes let her journal at nighttime.  Its sometimes a source of contention because she would rather do that than go to bed when its bedtime.  And she's only six so she doesn't always have the truest of motives when she asks.  In spite of that, I've felt that there's something there that needs to be cultivated and nurtured so I've given her permission to do so often when she asks.

Here is what happened:  I came in to her room to turn out her light and make her finally "go to bed" after receiving the look from mommy because she was still awake when mommy came back from a trip to the store.  I went in to say one last "goodnight" and she asked me if she could show me the song she had just written.  I said sure.  She then sang to me the sweetest few lines.

"I Love the snow when it gets played in. And when the rain falls down. And I love sunny days as well."

There was a peace and presence in her room.  I knew what it was.  Or should I say I knew Who it was.  My little girl was tapping into a gift that had been given to her by her heavenly Father and He had showed up to see her use it. I'm sure it was because he was blessed by it.  I was too and I knew it was one of those special times that are all too rare in the hurried pace of modern life.

Understand, its not because the words were all that profound. The words on the page were misspelled the way most 1st graders would. Neither was it because the melody was so pure. It wasn't even because her voice was like that of an angel.  It was in my opinion, simply a Father delighting in his child.   I guess you could say both fathers were delighting in their child.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Brewer to Obama: Warning Signs Are Not Enough

I really just don't understand why its so hard to see how stupid this is. This infuriates me to no end when I hear what is really going on. Instead of putting troops and resources at our borders we bail out wall street and banks and other idiots that won't get off their butts and work for a living.
Watch this video....

I lived in Arizona for a while as a kid and I loved it. This just makes me furious that a President of the U.S. would think this is defending our borders.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Carpet cleaning...and other general craziness at our house

So last week I had a second "surgery" on my right shoulder.  It was more like a procedure really.  I had not gotten all of my ROM (That's Range of Motion for you lay people out there) back and had hit a wall in physical therapy. Now I'm recovering from a procedure and on narcotics for pain, albeit not taking them that much. And I'm supposed to be working from home this week because we are always "encouraged" to keep our billable utilization as high as possible.  So remote phone training sessions and other services are what I'm trying to provide while I'm rehabbing my bum shoulder.  PT appointments every day as well.
Well, it just so happens that we have been trying (not very hard) to get a bid for someone to come fix the walls and ceiling in our master bedroom from water damage that occurred during last years spring storms.  We got a bid we liked and the guy could start right away so we decided to do that at the same time.  This meant taking all the furniture out of the master bedroom and filling the rest of the house with it.  Which of course made the house unlivable for the week so we all moved to Grandma's house. 
Phew.....    We had a lot going on I guess you could say.   Well, when you clear a room of its furniture you really get a good look at the carpet in the room.  Underneath all the dust-bunnies it needed help.  So we thought, let's clean the carpets too.
Those carpet cleaning machines that you can rent from Albertson's are great.  Maybe too great... It did such a good job on our master bedroom that we thought we'd move a bunch of furniture around in the other rooms and clean all the carpets. We have a blond dog, a snow white cat and forest green carpets in all the bedrooms, living room and dining room.
Picture all of this with me crammed up in the corner of the dining room trying to work with furniture from the master bedroom all around me. Nothing like a little last minute home improvement project!   Of course, I forgot to mention that my daughter was attending a diabetes day camp put on my the ADA across town so we had to ferry her back and forth every morning and afternoon as well.  The funny thing is, it didn't really seem that abnormal for us.
Yes, my life really is a bruehaha.  And not just sometimes.

P.S.  The doctor wanted to really make sure we're getting the most out of our PT this time so he sent me home with my own personal torture rack to stretch my shoulder. 
See picture below taken at Grandma's house.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Going the extra mile at work...,Or learning is its own reward "In The End"

This last week I took a day off of work so that I could get a second procedure done on my right shoulder.  I've been nursing it back to health since dislocating it badly last October while mowing the lawn.  It's a long story that maybe I'll tell on here soon. It suffices to say that I think twice now before I do any yard work.  Anyway, since I'm convalescing this week and off of the road I thought I should share a recent story from work.
A few weeks ago I was at a Gastroenterology group in Kentucky.  This group had recently gone through a conversion of systems and was in need of someone to help them navigate the pitfalls of the new system and its alien workflows.  So I was chosen to go up there and be the hero.  They were a nice group of doctors and staff and things were going very well.  I hit it off with one of the doctors that was from South Africa and was showing him all the wonders of his new system.  To my surprise this doctor said that where he really needed my help was tomorrow when he was doing procedures in the GI Suite over at the local hospital.  I remarked that I could do that.  "Sure, no problem." I said.  "You just let me know where it is and what time and I'll be there".   Of course I had no idea what I was really getting myself into at this point.  I thought it would just mean me sitting with him in the doctor's lounge after he'd finished a procedure and then helping him to document it.  Easy as pie.  I mean some of these types of things I've done so many times I could probably do them with my eyes shut. 
So, early the next morning with my tummy full from a bagel at the hotel breakfast bar and the caffeine from at least one diet coke coursing through my veins I showed up at the GI suite and promptly presented my business card and asked for Dr so and so.  The charge nurse took one look at me and smiled wryly and said "follow me".  I did as was told and we wondered down a long hall with rooms on either side marked "Procedure 1" and so on. She took me to an open procedure room and showed me a desk in the corner of the room and said the doctor was in a procedure but would be with me in a few minutes.  As I made myself comfortable at the small desk crowded with hospital bulletins and various pieces and parts of medical machinery not currently in use I thought to myself that they must not have a doctor's lounge.  "Hmmm, low budget I guess.  Times are tight" I mused. 
After a few minutes the door adjoining to the suite next to this one opened and a nurse said "You can come in here now.  We've got a few minutes before the next one"  I gathered my laptop bag and walked through the door she was in, dodging gurneys and medical devices until I saw the doctor dressed in scrubs with his surgical mask still on the top of his head.  He was sitting at a desk in the corner just like the one that I had just left.  He was already logged into our software and was ready to document what he had just done.  "Splendid" I thought.  "This guy is on the ball.  I'll be outta here and back on my way to the office in no time".
We went through how to document a colonoscopy and EGD, making sure to mention the correct form of anesthesia and the technical names of the instruments used.  It was a very neat and tidy note.  Any specialist would have been proud to send it back to a referring doctor.  
About this time, I happen to look over my right shoulder and I notice a new gurney with a patient laying on it.  She was awake and looking around and her eyes caught my eyes for a brief moment.  That moment seemed like it took about 60 seconds.  It was like everything froze in time.  The doctor must have seen the dazed and confused look on my face because as he rose and put on new gloves and surgical mask he said, "Have you ever seen a colonoscopy before?"......  He then said hello to the patient and asked if she minded if I was in there to observe and help him with his new computer system.   To my surprise and horror she said no, she didn't mind.   I was suddenly struck dumb for the next 5 minutes.  It was as if I lost all ability to produce speech.  I didn't know what to say even if I could have spoken. 
I immediately turned and faced the computer screen in the corner. Thoughts raced through my mind of what was about to happen and why am I here and is this all a big joke.  I wondered if Ashton Kutcher was in the next room with a television crew secretly tapping this.  Or perhaps "Candid Camera" was back on the air again.   Then reality hit and I realized I wasn't a celebrity and didn't know anyone capable of pulling such an elaborate hoax.  No, this was exactly what I thought it was.  I was going to be here for a while. And with that the procedure started and sounds and smells and experiences that I never in my life expected to endure started happening to me against my will.   I fought hard to keep my eyes and ears focused on the tiny computer desk and not think about what was going on a foot and a half behind me.  Some patients would cry out during the middle of their tests as if they were in pain.  "Oh it hurts" one lady said crying in a loud voice. (Someone told me later that they couldn't really feel anything, they were just acting out.  Conscious sedation they called it)  It scared the heck out of me sure enough. The doctors and nurses would engage in mundane conversations while they performed their duties as if nothing of note was happening at all.  Add to that the occasional irruptions of flatulence and the constant background of vacuuming sounds, all of which was being put on a DVD for the lucky patient to watch at home.  Now there's some quality entertainment I tell ya......"Hey honey, wanna watch my colonoscopy tonight after the kids are in bed?"
I sat through it all. The doc would finish procedure after procedure and then come sit down with me and make small talk while we documented what was just done.  At least while he was sitting there working the mouse, it was safe for me to look around.  So I would stretch my neck and back while he was working the software because I knew in the next few minutes I would be stiff as a board again.   This went on for the better part of 2 hours and I endured it all.  An assault on my senses like none I've ever had before or hope to have ever again.  And as we were starting the last procedure I felt like I had accomplished something.  I had made it.  The evil GI Suite had not stolen my innocence.  Nay....I was about to immerge victorious!
And then it happened.  Almost involuntarily I turned to the right and my eyes caught the site of some poor soul sitting there on their side all prepped and ready to go.   Yes, the moon was out and shinning in all its fullness.  My neck snapped back around with the velocity of a sling-shot.   Suddenly my victory had been stolen from me and I was defeated. 
Well, all I can say was that the doctor was very appreciative and gave me rave reviews back to my superiors at work.  I got several "Atta boys" from important people.  Of course none of them had any idea what I went through to please this physician.  But that is the way that the world works.  We are asked to fight our battles and no one cares much what it was like.  They just want to know if you won the war.   I guess I came out better than the people who were in the gurneys.  Perhaps.  At least they know the state of their colons.
Anyway, I found myself laughing out loud on the way back to the hotel that night.  As a matter of fact, I laughed so hard that I had tears coming to my eyes and it was hard to see to drive.
So as they say....."All's well that Ends well"

Editors note: No fannys were harmed in the making of this blog post.  The picture is a stock photo from Google Images.  Did you really think I would've taken a picture?

Friday, June 4, 2010

Thank you to everyone for the birthday wishes

Facebook has been a part of my life now for over a year and it still amazes me how something so simple in concept can have such a profound impact on my life.  I don't base my life on FB or anything like that, but it sure does add enrichment in many ways.  One of the best is the fact that friends both old and new have the ability to see when your birthday is and pass along wishes of peace and happiness.
Don't take this for granted.  This last birthday was my last one in my thirties and one where I found myself all alone in a city where I knew no one except some new work aquaintances.   I was trying to be upbeat about it, but I have to admit that it was a major bummer. Its just not the kind of scenario you hope for on your birthday. 
My family was never too big on birthdays.  Not like my wife's family. Or at least to hear my wife and her sister describe it.  So I've never made too much fuss over the day.  At least not since I was a kid.  And we all know that once you get past a certain age, especially as a father, your birthday takes a back seat to pretty much everything else going on in life.  That's ok, I've come to accept it.  I'm at peace...
So, with that as my past I didn't have very big expectations.  But a phenomenon took place yesterday that really was something quite special.  I got "Happy Birthday Wishes" from a large number of my facebook friends. That may not seem like a big deal.  But think about what that represents.  When's the last time you sent a Birthday Card to someone you went to high school with?  Or a college roommate?  Or even a past workmate?   Probably never if you're like most of us.   It is not that you don't want them to have a nice remembrance of the day of their birth, its just that you are too busy and its too inconvenient.  Facebook actually makes it convenient to pass along these wishes!  Kinda cool actually.  And the net effect is that I was thrilled at how many people knew and cared that it was the anniversary of the day I arrived on this planet.
It really is amazing.  So the moral of this story is this. When you see that notification on the side of your home feed, take the time to pass along best wishes.  It really does make someone's day.  I know it did mine!

I'd like to thank each and everyone of the following list of people for taking the time to say "Happy Birthday" to me.

Mickey Inzer
George Demars
Crystal Liechty
Sage Hancock
Lisa Church
Kim Repnow
Amy Hopkins
Paulette Aguda
Mike Mershawn
Paula Dehncke
Bryan Jobe
Spring Rowell
Rene Hollingsworth
Legrand Joye
Ronnie Hollingsworth
Tim Ross
Mattison Brown
Ronzelle Green
Karri Wright
Kyle Nordberg
Jane Brink
David Rowley
Calvin Steedee Brown
Amanda Saner
George McCowan
Andrea McCrohan
Carlene Fonseca
Paula Sauls
Zanda Lampkin
Karen Woods
Shanna Pritchet
Bruce Oakes
Kimberly Brannon Cartin
Floyd Counce
Bonnie Matthews
Tracie Thomas
Josh Williams
Jason Frith
Chris Walker
JD Crowe
Tammy Nowiki
Jeff Rigler
Carmen Lynn Druckenmiller
Wendy King Whitfield
Niels Rojas
Tammy Sisk Emanuele
Mandy Mullikin Kibler
Tonya Gilbert
Allison Harbin
Stacey Warren Chatman
Lauren Johannes Missling
Jeni Gerich Long
Kimberly Deus Sullivan
Bryan Gillespie
Rob Perry
Stacy Hannan Debord
Jeff Waycoff
Kim Sudtelgte
Ben Dobberstein
Noni Hoadley
Leslie Spears Hooker
George Mcleese
Tommy Willis
Michelle Knighton
Ben Clark
Cynthia Wilson
JodyJo Joplin
Gary Graves
Becky Mullowney
Roland Entralgo
Cheo Jackson
Jane Brink
Travis Harbin
Christine Allen
Judy Eckhardt
Shannon Demars Wolf
Brittany Wendehorst
Linda Young
Sonya Kennedy Martz
Kenitha Hudgins Davis
Marty Nance
Barbara Henson Grisell
Timi Ingles Earls
Jason Callender
Jung Jacob Song
Sonya Bolt
Cecily Willard
Stacey Dalryample Rogers
Windy LeCroy Broadwell
Jennifer Maxwell
Tomeka Elam Walker
Kathy Phelps
C Jason McDonald
Jen Brakora
Elaine Richter
Mike Petersen
Theresa McCullough
Jie Jie Tang
Melissa DeAngelis
Christina Nicholson
Adrienne Graves
Marilyn Vickery
Emily Keeran Vickery
Lawrence Patterson
Wesley Steven Wolf
Portia Richmond
Eugene McBride
Jennifer Adams Brown
Adriana Cunningham
Shelley Fonseca
Joy Cooper
Allison Cavey Vermie
Clint Bargmann
Bob Moore
Gazelle Schreiber
Kristen Minth
Mg Gaskin
Eva Fleming McCall
Lisa Spero
Delahne Wright
Rebecca Kennedy Hunt
Patrick Ward
Shelley Kolman Tait
Vonda Olkjer Sisneros
Janell Carlson

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

My Mom

She raised two boys. She was far from perfect. She was both a shinning example and a royal pain in the arse. What can I say, she was my mom. The one who brought me into this world. So much of who I am is because of what she poured into me. From her I learned to laugh, to love the beauty of God's creation and how to hang on to God's word and promises. There are things in my family's history and ancestry that I love that came down to me from her. My grand-father the artist who painted signs at carnivals and played music in a time when being a musician was magical. I like to think that I have his creative essence deep inside me. This I got through her. At the same time there are things that I don't like about myself that I know I got from her. Like her abysmal ability to manage money. And other dark things that sometimes haunt my personality. But its all part of the package. She wasn't easy but she was my mother. And though I didn't realize it often or tell her nearly enough, I loved her dearly.

This past Sunday was the first Mother's day that I've ever spent on this earth without her. That thought seems to echo inside me in a hollow and empty space whenever I allow my brain to speak it. It's like a bottomless pit. The kind that when you drop a stone into it you never hear it hit. Just blackness and nothing. My wife asked me on Mother's day as we were at church if I was alright. I didn't know what to say really. On one hand I was with her, the beautiful mother of my own children and celebrating all that is good about mothers. But on the other hand, I had an ache that I couldn't put to words.

I've thought about writing something about mom now for several weeks but when it came to sitting down and actually typing the words, I always shyed away from the act because I just didn't want to go there emotionally. I'd really love to be able to put together a witty essay extolling the virtues of my mother but its just not in me.....yet. Perhaps next year when I've had time to process. After we've placed a proper headstone on her grave. Right now, there are just so many thoughts and feelings and stories even that have yet to settle in my soul. All I can for now is, I am who I am because of her. She will forever be a part of me and my progeny.

I love you mom. I miss you. I'm sorry your life ended the way that it did. I hope you're proud of me.

See you after a while.

Your Sugar Bear
Arron

Thursday, April 1, 2010

California as an Analogy for America...Pt 2

I had to make the drive back down I-10 from Palm Springs back to Ontario today and those same feelings of lothing started to come back.  Its no wonder that they have so many highway shootings.  If traffic was this bad in Texas where everybody has a gun......Armagedon, LOL

So I arrived at my hotel after being led astray by my Sprint Navigation app on my Palm Pre.  If I didn't know better I'd say it played an April Fool's Day prank on me.  Add all of this together and I was ripe to tell the world about how little I like this part of So Cal.   That's where my good friend Sage comes in.  She actually reads my blog (can you believe that?) and she forwarded some additional information to me about the plight that California is in with illegal immigration.  So, instead of me having to be creative I thought I'd just post what she sent and give the credit to her.  Please visit her blog at http://gps-sage.blogspot.com/  After reading this you have to be at least a little concerned.  Enjoy....

Just One State


This is only one State...............If this doesn't open your eyes nothing will !





From the L. A. Times

1. 40% of all workers in L. A. County ( L. A. County has 10.2 million people)are working for cash and not paying taxes. This is because they are predominantly illegal immigrants working without a green card.

2. 95% of warrants for murder in Los Angeles are for illegal aliens.

3. 75% of people on the most wanted list in Los Angeles are illegal aliens.

4. Over 2/3 of all births in Los Angeles County are to illegal alien Mexicans on Medi-Cal , whose births were paid for by taxpayers.

5. Nearly 35% of all inmates in California detention centers are Mexican nationals here illegally

6. Over 300,000 illegal aliens in Los Angeles County are living in garages.

7. The FBI reports half of all gang members in Los Angeles are most likely illegal aliens from south of the border.

8. Nearly 60% of all occupants of HUD properties are illegal.

9. 21 radio stations in L. A. are Spanish speaking.

10. In L. A. County 5.1 million people speak English, 3.9 million speak Spanish.
(There are 10.2 million people in L. A. County. )

(All 10 of the above are from the Los Angeles Times)

Less than 2% of illegal aliens are picking our crops, but 29% are on welfare.
Over 70% of the United States' annual population growth (and over 90% of California, Florida , and New York) results from immigration. 29% of inmates in federal prisons are illegal aliens.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

So Now I'm Lower Middle-Class 'eh?

Money...I've always told myself it wasn't really that important in my life.  And for the most part, I think that's true.  I don't really consider myself greedy and I haven't spent a great deal of effort trying to get more.  I mean, I sell stuff on ebay occasionally, but I think that's as much to get rid of junk as it is to make money.  As a matter of fact, I'd be willing to bet that most of the money I've made by selling stuff was spent on some new stuff before it had a chance to sit in my bank and earn any interest.  We're talking in the low hundreds of dollars here. 

Early in my adult life I made a decision to move into a job that could support my family.  I had recently come from a Christian university where I studied to be a music minister.  There's two things that are desitined to keep you in poverty when you put them together.  Music and ministry.  Talk about being young and idealistic. So, since my wife had majored in Art and I had majored in Music I thought it was probably a good idea to get a "real job". Plus, I had an experience that turned me off to chruch politics forever.  I decided that music was something that I dearly loved and because of that, I didn't want to do it for a living. That was a money decision as large as any I had ever made in my life at that point.  Other than that, I really haven't been that concerned with filthy lucre.  Sure, I love to have it and love to spend it even more.  But its just not who I am.  I'm just as happy giving it away a lot of times.  

Anyway, I said all of that to say this....I happened upon this article on Yahoo Finance that says that now I'm lower middle-class.  According to how much I make, blah blah blah, yada yada yada....
I grew up lower middle class to just plain poor.  I mean mom had two of us boys to raise and she was terrible with money.  So I guess I should be happy that I've moved up in the world right?   I don't know.  Its just that if you'd have told me when I was a kid that I would be making what I'm making now I don't know if I'd have believed it. Well, then again I probably would have.  I have always been optimistic.  :)
I think that I would have assumed though that making as much as I do would mean I was well off, or at least above the middle income.   Oh well!   At least I can truly say that we are blessed.  My wife is able to stay at home with our two girls and we really don't lack for anything.  Really, if you compared my salary with the other 6 billion people in the world, I'd come out in the top 1%.   That's not bad.

Its good for me to remember that.   Ahhh, that's better. 

One thing that has been really good for me and my family has been going through the Dave Ramsey program called "Finacial Peace University".  If money is something that bothers you in the slightest, I highly recommend it.
Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University Audio CD Library: 13 Life Changing Lessons

California as an Analogy for America

This week I have the good fortune of traveling to Palm Springs, California for my job.  I know, I know.  It is a tough job and I do get paid to do it.  Palm Springs is a wonderful place filled with beautiful golf courses, cars, people and scenery.  When I first started coming here in January I was amazed by the juxtaposition of emerald green golf courses and snow capped mountains in the background.  Absolutely beautiful!

This time instead of flying into the Palm Springs airport and perhaps enjoying a celebrity sighting or two, the bean counters at the "Big Orange" suggested I fly into Ontario, CA and drive for about 90 minutes to Palm Springs.  That was fine with me because I enjoy a nice drive in good weather.  And let's face it, southern California in spring is almost always great weather. 

So, I jumped into my Nissan Sentra and started down I-10 east, along with about 10 million other drivers it seemed, bound for the Coachella Valley.  It was then that something occurred to me about California.  I can't really understand why so many people want to be here.  I mean the weather is nice and all, but there are so many other things that don't appeal.  I only have to be here for a few hours before I start to be ready to leave.  There's smog, over population, terrible traffic, smog, a post Judeo-Christian culture, inflated prices on everything from food to real-estate, smog, and the state is practically bankrupt. Thinking through all of these issues I wondered if this wasn't a blaring analogy for where America is headed in its current direction.  I mean they have had bleeding heart liberals running the state for decades and I think the policies had taken their toll.  I'm no expert or political pundit. But this is the world's fifth largest economy and many of the same things that congress and the current administration (and previous administrations on both sides of the isle to be fair) are doing are the what got California into the state that its in now.  Lax immigration policies. Entitlement programs that they can no longer afford. Moving away from the Judeo-Christian moral compass that values life and family.     Is this a looking glass for us to see where America will be in 10 years?    I wonder....

Monday, March 22, 2010

To blog, or not to blog. That is the question

So I've been thinking about another blog post for a while now.  I've discovered a few things about blogs in the short time that I've been doing one. 
First, a blog is not necessarily the same thing as a journal. I mean, it could be and I think some people blog about things that are very personal and feel like they can be completely honest in their blog and say whatever they feel. For me, as I pondered what I was encountering in my life and travels and the feelings and reactions that would happen in me, I quickly realized that I can't exactly say everything in this forum.  I'm not saying that I'm going to lie here.  On the contrary I plan to be almost brutally honest at times and bring out the truth whenever I can recognize it.  But, since my wife, in-laws, ministers, friends and family are among my readers and there are no doubt things that some in those groups don't want others in those groups to know, I think its smarter to keep certain observations to myself.  The blog can definitely be cathartic, but propriety necessitates that I adhere to a code. Keep that which is meant to be private within me. Or at the very least keep from blurting it out in a public forum like this. I used to write in a journal in college and for a time after that and I'm thinking that for my own growth and sanity in some cases I will take up journal writing again very soon.  There will no doubt be topics and entries that end up in both medium.
A second observation about blogs is more an observation about myself and how I'd like my readers to perceive me and my blog.  It is simply this....I want this blog to be of a certain quality and for the people who take the time to read it to enjoy it.  It's been over two weeks since I last posted.  When I first started I was thinking that I'd be a two or three time a week poster depending on how many interesting things happened to me or how many witty anecdotes I could come up with.  I've found myself in the shower often thinking of possible blog topics, and mentally throwing crumpled up papers at the waste basket in my imagination.  (I do some of my best thinking in the shower.  Some people sing, I just think about stuff.  I do sing also, but usually it turns into a cartoon like rendition of a Rodgers and Hammerstein classic.  Oklahoma is one of my favorites...just ask my wife)  You know, I had originally hoped that the process of coming up with these posts would be much more organic.  That the topics would just overflow out of a wealth of juicy human experiences.  Yeah, well that brings me to my next observation about blogging....
With all the different ways available to us for sharing our lives through social media, it's a little harder than I expected to wait until you have enough stuff to make a decent blog post.  I mean there's Facebook, which makes it easy to post a status update and let people know what you're thinking or what is going on.  And because those posts are usually shorter and more direct, they are easier to come up with and faster.  There is also Twitter and Linked In.  I'm not really that into tweeting. I've got an account and I occasionally tweet but I have to admit I just don't "get it" when it comes to tweeting.  I guess you can say I haven't found that sweet spot or had that "ah ha!" moment with it.  The interactions with twitter don't seem to be all that informative or fun to me.  I'm sure there are plenty that disagree with me on that.  Just not my thing yet and at this rate unless someone drops some revelation of the twitterverse on me, I don't think it ever will be.  Linked In I use for work/career related networking almost exclusively so there isn't a lot of honesty to be found on there.  (Said with tongue firmly in cheek)  I know there are plenty of other social networking sites also.  I almost forgot to mention YouTube.   I got a really cool Flip video camera that fits in my pocket for Christmas (thanks to my totally awesome in-laws, I love you guys).  So I've even found ways to use it to chronicle some of my adventures.  Again, this sucks creativity away from the blog process.   I know, I know...I could post those videos to my blog.   Give me time; I'm working on learning to do that.  That's actually a goal of mine for a coming post.  But you get the picture.
Put all this together and it really has made me appreciate the discipline and emerging art form of blogging.  I'm still new to it and learning fast but I obviously have a long way to go.   At least I made myself sit down tonight in my hotel room and get this post down.   That deserves a pat on the back and perhaps a "Little Debbie - Nutty Bar".   Mmmm, hmmmm!   I'll eat one and dedicate it to my good friend Rev. R. Kelly Johnson in Kenya.
Cheers

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Let's see if I can post to my blog while i'm standing around waiting for my clients to make use of me. :)

So what IS with all the bruehaha?


This is it! My first blog. I just love saying that word....Buh Lah Guh. Something kinda fun about it. I imagine that if you tried to say it after having your face numbed for a dental procedure that it could be quite funny. But I digress...

Anyway, I've been toying with the idea of doing one of these for a while. I get the urge to put my thoughts down sometimes. Sometimes deep thoughts, other times just waxing a little poetic, or pathetic as the case may be. So, for any of you bored enough to want to read along on this "bruehaha" of an excursion that I call my life and times welcome. Jump on in.

But I gotta warn ya, my life ain't simple and I don't plan to put up a rose colored facad as so many of my Christian brothers and sisters are want to do.

So, in the words of one of my favorite characters, Jon Luc Picard....."Engage" (Yes I know i'm a geek)